From this reading, I think I’ve realized a thing or two about service. I tried to be as active as I could be in high school, but usually my commitments to service felt stretched, annoying, and not very enjoyable. I went through the motions because I was being “should upon” (Dass 157). And after reading Dass’ opinion about service, I’ve realized why it wasn’t as rewarding as I always thought it would be. Because I didn’t “discover” (Dass 157). I didn’t do the research on my own, I attended my Student Council meetings and was told about what we could do to volunteer. More than once, I heard my friends say that we were merely the manual workers of StuCo and that our opinion about things didn’t matter. And to an extent, it was true. We tried to express desires about helping certain causes and had little response from the executives. I can’t complain, though, because it is my fault that I didn’t know about what I was volunteering for. I could have researched and found my own ways of helping out and that would have been more me. Maybe I was too lazy or maybe I lacked self-confidence.
Whatever it was, I lacked passion for the things I put effort into. And then my friend had an excellent idea. We were both part of a string quartet and she suggested playing for nursing homes. I realized that I could share my love of music with others and in doing so, I could bring joy to people and I could also do something I love. From what I’ve read by Dass concerning service, this seems to be the ideal of service. Music is a huge part of who I am and sharing it with others and this was the best part.
However, from this StuCo experience, I found I had to respect the opinions of others. I realized how it felt to be ignored and have what you care about pushed aside. Ram Dass said that “if you try to dominate people, you are already defeated” (Dass 168). I have to agree. Student Council dominated me. Our meetings were all mandatory and there was a very strict system to follow. I had trouble dealing with people that couldn’t listen to me and could not respect the opinions of the people that did most of their work. Thus, StuCo activities became a hassle. They were not enjoyable because my heart wasn’t in them and I had no passion for the cause because we knew nothing about it. Volunteering became a way to make the number of points required of each six weeks rather than this rewarding experience of helping people in need.
So I’ve decided that to be involved, I can’t do what is expected of me or what I think would look best to other people. I need to find things that interest me and find groups that have a cause that I have looked into and researched before I dedicate myself to it. “Everybody’s trying to make the best of a nutty situation” (Dass 242) and that everybody includes me. I just need to find my spot in this nutty situation and figure out what I can do to help. After reading Dass, I have more confidence in my ability to listen to the problems of others and assessing what I can do to make situations better. In the movie “Keeping the Faith,” a young rabbi is trying to push his congregation into grow and expand religiously. However, his methods are extreme and the head rabbi tells him that he will get more response if the people feel that they are being “lead and not pushed.” I have to tell myself that I can’t push people into agreeing with me.
When I watched “Earthlings,” I made the decision to give up eating red meat. When I tell people about it, I have to remind myself not to have an “air of superiority” (Dass 158) in how I convey my reasoning for this decision. I have to explain myself at a perspective from how I feel rather than how they should feel. And based on these terms, I am excited about launching myself out into the world and helping out in any way I can.
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